Call the Exterminator! There’s a Toddler in the House!


We had a great playdate yesterday.

The boys (my two, 5 &6 and their friend, 6) played together very well and left minimal mess. Their friend’s mom is also my new friend and we play well together too. She is very friendly and sweet while I’m…well…not, and our conversations are very easy (if maybe a tad too polite).

Then there’s the little sister.

She just turned one and she’s walking. Holy shit is she ever walking! I really did take this into account before they came and I spent the better part of the morning “babyproofing” my home. Turns out I forgot was babyproofing actually means.

She touched Every. Single. Thing. In my living room. Which led her very-patient mother to move Every. Single. Thing. In my living room. Keep in mind that I have two little boys. I do not keep a Ming vase, crystal whiskey decanter, or collection of Franklin Mint plates in my living room. I thought I was pretty much in the clear. I was wrong.

Babies throw Wii games and chew on the controllers. I forgot. Babies steal the car keys and use the remote starter. I forgot! Did you know that babies climb bookshelves? Because I FORGOT!!

Here I am, thinking I’m a seasoned, seen-it-all-before MegaMom. I have totally let it escape my memory that babies are completely different animals from 5 year olds. I let the occasional markered wall or maple syrupy floor make me think I was still dealing with the same stuff. Again: WRONG.

Hats off to all the moms who are still chasing after toddlers, or up all night with infants…or up all night with teenagers. I for one will happily deal with my kid-kids and forget that I ever had or ever will have to deal with all the other delightful stages of parenthood. You are heroes who should have a beer commercial made in your honor.

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About mecarol

A weird mom and her weird husband trying to raise their weird kids in this increasingly weird world.
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